I Am Changed!

I have two words for you, Anonymous: THANK YOU!

My life has totally changed for the better. I have not been using offensive language and I have found that everything is working out. I am getting along with everyone and the daisies I planted last spring are actually blooming and puppies are scampering through my yard! Amazing for January, isn't it? My child is now guaranteed to have friends in school and Harvard has offered her a full scholarship in 2025. In fact, I can't be sure, but I believe that the Palestinians and the Israelis have actually worked things out, too! World peace! And all because no one is using the F-word. Why didn't anyone think of that before? So, thank you, Anonymous, for helping me!

Yes, I'm being facetious. For further reference, please refer to Mr. Brooks' quote on the right side of this page.

The problem with anonymous comments is that the person commenting anonymously isn't putting his- or herself out there for others to judge, but are quick to pass judgment. How do I know you're not a clean-mouthed pedophile? I believe that my friend Jason summed up all my feelings for me, but believe it or not, I do see some merit in not cursing around children. And although I believe my three-month-old to be gifted (what mother doesn't?), she cannot read yet, and won't see the "unladylike" comments on my blog. And when and if she does, I hope she has enough sense to know that freedom of speech is a gift. I was judged and I understand that. So someone thinks I'm white trash. That's actually funny to me.

Anyway, I did find a way to appear popular for a few days there. :)

Minor Catastrophes

I already broke my goddamn New Year's resolution and it's not even January 1st! Does it count if you break it before January? I had the idea that I wouldn't say or think anything mean. Yeah, I know it's a huge resolution. I think it lasted about 10 minutes.

Things have been frustrating and annoying since my last romantic post, even though my husband and baby continue to amaze me with love. I'm not sure I want to discuss the "issue," though. Part of the problem is actually my honesty and my insane need to write when I am frustrated and angry. And of course I choose to write on a public forum. If nothing else, this post will be cryptic. Things are very messed up in one area of my life, although it's not really an area that I very much care about. However, it seems like lately it's been consuming us like a fire storm even though I'd love to just throw it all away. I think I have emotionally done that, but Dan hasn't quite yet and I'm attempting to help him do that. But right now Dan is sick of talking about it and Katie is amusing herself with a rattling toy in the living room, so I came on here to make peace with my own words. I guess I have. After listening to a little KT Tunstall (I highly recommend it) I feel better:

"Miniature disasters and minor catastrophes
Bring me to my knees
Well I must be my own master
Or a miniature disaster will be
It will be the death of me"

I like the idea of minor catastrophes. That's basically our problem as humans. We like to think our problems are SO important. Just watch the History channel or Discovery and you'll find that we're one celestial rock away from the end.

So in order to make sense of my "minor catastrophe," I just spent an hour going through past posts because I was looking for evidence of something. I wound up reading a lot of crap that my own mind produced, but mostly I read memories of my old workplace and Jason. I miss Jason. Hell, I even began missing Bitchony and the way me and Jay used to roll our eyes in disgust and hate. Ahhh, sweet memories.

All of this could be summed up as cryptically as above with my own quote:

"...because I don't know how to say 'fuck off' in Latin!"

The Gift

Merry Christmas, everyone! I wish you all a very happy new year, too. And just for the record, I see nothing wrong with "Happy Holidays." So, Happy Everything.

I have received the best Christmas present I will ever receive: my daughter. It's been an amazing couple of months with my new best friend. I know I sound like a bragging mother (and I am), but she is the best baby a person could hope for. It sounds odd considering my usually cynical outlook on things, but I'm wondering how I got so damn lucky.

My uncle summed it up best last night when he said, "You're one of the happiest mothers I've seen in a very long while." I am. I'm happy.