Productive Musings

I just googled myself.

Okay, I really just used Yahoo, but googled sounds so much cooler.

The most ironic thing about my blog is that the people who would most love to read it probably can't find it. And that is on purpose.

Doing a brief search for myself, I could tell by the Yahoo suggestions that someone is trying to find my old website--or anything connected to me that I may be writing. Why? Well, the person who is (probably) looking has been unable to be part of my life. I should use the word banished because that, too, sounds cooler. Okay. He was banished from my life and the life of my family.

I started a website back in 1995. It was the rudimentary prototype of today's blog. I played around with the html. I wrote various thoughts for years. I let people--anyone who found the site or knew the address--to get a glimpse into my thoughts and feelings. And that was my error. I wrote something very personal and the wrong person read it, exploited it, and the hassle of it caused me to delete the whole thing.

Now I won't do that. Maybe it's because I'm older. Maybe it's because I don't want the drama. Maybe it's both.

But the truth of it is that I don't want the banished to find out anything about my life. Living vicariously through my blog is what he is trying to do. Perhaps he's looking for photos of my daughter. Perhaps he's just obsessed with the possibility that I'll say something--anything--about him. Whatever the case, he's not getting anything from me. Sorry, you're banished.

Not you. You're welcome to read on.